There has been a mass whinge-storm on Twitter from unhappy Leeds United “fans” upset at having to wait until as late as 4pm on Thursday to carp at, slag off, destroy, ridicule and otherwise criticise the club’s latest signing, Luke Ayling from Bristol City. Ayling’s likely capture was first rumoured two days ago, and some dedicated moaners have been champing at the bit ever since, just waiting to pour scorn on the deal. The delay has been described as “cruelty to dumb beasts”.
Ayling is known as a versatile defender of great promise, able to operate anywhere across a back four, and some feel that this will make him a valuable asset for the Leeds United squad. Having waited impatiently to slag the lad off, though, some Twitter users are now holding nothing back in showing their absolute contempt for the signing. “Ah’ve never heard of this ‘ere player and Ah know nowt about him,” said one cantankerous individual from Pontefract, “but I can tell thee here and now that he’s rubbish and nowhere near the quality we need to sign. And whoever this Premier League midfielder is, he’s rubbish too. Absolutely bluddy useless. What’s Garry Monk playing at? He’s nivver consulted me, tha knows.”
Life, Leeds United, the Universe & Everything asked the career complainer, who wished to remain anonymous but whose name is Ivor Bigg-Gripe of Monkhill, what he might think of any other prospective signings this transfer window. “Well, you’ll have to wait for mah detailed observations, lad,” our man said, cautiously. “It doesn’t seem fair to rip ’em to shreds till they’ve actually signed, ‘owever long I ‘ave to wait. But I can tell thi now, they’re crap, whoever they are. Useless. All of ’em. And tha can quote me on that.”
Leeds are expected to complete a couple more deals before the end of the window, with as many as three players leaving the club. Twitter users on the LUFC hashtag are virtually unanimous in their disapproval of the un-named transfer targets, whilst agreeing nem. con. that whoever is moving out is vital to the team and should not be let go at any price.
The Leeds United Twitter feed has been officially classified as “ludicrous”.