Fifty-Two bleedin’ quid? That is a liberty, my son. No wonder a certain ‘Ammers blogger has decided not to bovver going dahn the Boleyn no more, preferring to stay in his bedsit and write, all obsessive-like, about bigger clubs. It seems to have brought out the spiteful schoolgirl in poor little HF, but you can’t blame the bloke for feeling all bitter and twisted. When you depend on the old rock an’ roll for your bees and honey, the last thing you need is your own club treating you like some right stupid Gareth Hunt. Even if young Scott really is as callow a youth as he sounds in his scribblings, it’s still nearly firty bladdy quid even for a dustbin lid. He’d be better off settling for a Barclays in front of the TV when One Direction are on. Strike a light, eh Guv’nor.
Anyway, the point surely is, for that kind of dosh, the punters that do go along and support their team deserve some entertainment, even in the inevitable event of a defeat to Manchester’s finest. Will such entertainment be on offer now that the walrus-faced manager has discovered he can nick a result without bovvering to name a striker in his line-up? It seems somewhat doubtful. The thing is – it worked at Spurs. They couldn’t figure it out, even after a goal-less first half and – aided by two flukes and a worldy – the ‘Ammers left the Spuds humiliated. Will Fat Sam be daft enough to expect Man City to fall for it too? He looks daft enough – but could he really be contemplating such folly?
You have to conclude that Allardyce must have another plan up his sleeve. He might look a bit thick, but you don’t get to be manager of even a minor and temporary top-flight club without being a bit fly. Surely then, Fat Sam will have something in mind to deal with the threat of City?
He may well be encouraged by the Jekyll and Hyde nature of the opposition. City have looked like world-beaters at times this season, especially at home though the standard of opposition they have so far met at the Etihad may possibly flatter them. Away from home, more cracks have shown than new manager Manuel Pellegrini would ideally like to see, needless defeats at Cardiff and Villa blotting the title contenders’ copybook. On paper, the ‘Apless ‘Ammers should be a stroll in the park for one of the true big guns of the Premier League, but they will need to be wary of more self-inflicted injury.
At home, before a live TV audience and with the encouragement of three bonus points gleaned from the Spuds fixture, you might expect Fat Sam to abandon caution and Sunday League tactical tricks, and just go for it against City. If this leads to a four goal defeat, well nobody could really hold that against him; West Ham will be looking towards their own lower end of the league to pick up points in the dog eat dog nature of a relegation fight. But if the ‘Ammers could keep the score down, or even nick a point – then expect Sam to be bragging in the press again come Saturday night, and good luck to him too.
It promises to be a long, hard season for the ‘Ammers – so Big Fat Sam will have to make hay while the sun shines and the odd fluke result as at White Hart Lane will at least keep the old duffer smiling until the Bubbles burst and his dreams, inevitably, fade and die.
As for HF – well, he’ll probably be too busy recycling his favourite clichés as he continues to concentrate on the One True United of Elland Road – but surely some kind ‘Ammers fan will be good enough to tell him how many goals City have won by. Publish it on the Leeds Utd NewsNow page – he’ll be sure to see it there.