Millwall Sell Out Hospitality Boxes for Leeds United “Cup Final” Opener – by Rob Atkinson

Millwall hospitality boxes - both SOLD OUT for the visit of Leeds United

Millwall hospitality boxes – both SOLD OUT for the visit of Leeds United

World Cup fever may be abating around the country with England’s dismal performances and early exit – but in one small and unregarded part of Sarf-east London, the bunting still flutters bravely, the excitement still builds and the atmosphere is abuzz with more than just the usual stench of unwashed bodies. Bermondsey is rocking with fevered anticipation, because Leeds United are on a journey from far-away civilisation into the Lions’ New Den.  The name of the Yorkshire giants is on the lips of every local resident who can “tawk pwopah” and those who can read are eagerly assimilating the preview articles in that giant of the local press, the “News Shopper” – a paper which rejoices in its description of being to local reporting what Julian Clary is to Rugby League. Excitement could hardly be any higher; there is a carnival atmosphere abroad on the narrow and dirty streets.  The biggest game of the season is first up – it’ll all be downhill from there.

Such is the level of interest in the Cup Final event that Millwall have actually sold out their hospitality boxes – the last word in Bermondsey executive luxury (pictured above) – almost two months ahead of the game. The boxes, constructed out of the finest Lidl-surplus cardboard and each furnished with a crate of White Lightening cider, a barrel of jellied eels and the latest in high-capacity, low-odour commodes, went on sale shortly after the opening fixture against Leeds was announced – and within 3 days, both boxes had completely sold out.  For two groups of up to three Millwall fans each to show such dedication and faith this far ahead of the season is as unprecedented as it is impressive.  The boxes cost a mind-boggling £17.49 each for the Leeds game, as opposed to a more reasonable £9.99 for an ordinary match – but even that’s still four times the average weekly wage for the fans of the Lions.  The fact that around half a dozen fanatics have made such a heavy investment is a mark of their faith in their relegation-cert favourites – and also, of course, of the attractiveness of a match with such famous opponents.

All that remains now is for the Lions to produce their normal enhanced level of effort for what they acknowledge is the biggest game in their calendar, with a view to replicating last season’s fluke result.  If that unlikely outcome could be made a reality, then it’ll be a case of Knees Up Muvver Brown all the way to Valentines Day, when upwards of a dozen intrepid souls will venture norf for the return fixture at Elland Road.

Yes, folks – World Cup or no World Cup, football fever is well under way in the noisome back-alleys of Bermondsey – as the countdown continues to the first of the Lions’ two glimpses of the big time next season.  Don’t miss out!  Both state-of-the-art hospitality boxes have gone, but your place in the stands is still up for grabs – so dig out those Turkish shirts, tool up, get some dutch courage dahn yer Gregory Peck – and it’s orf to the Den on August the 9th – Cup Final day!!

See yer dahn there, me old china plates…

13 responses to “Millwall Sell Out Hospitality Boxes for Leeds United “Cup Final” Opener – by Rob Atkinson

  1. AllWhiteNow

    Stoppit, stoppit….. hahahahahah…….. oh my gawd blimey….laugh?? I thought I’d never stop….. You are a Wicked Man Rob Lomax…..
    “…that giant of the local press, the “News Shopper” – a paper which rejoices in its description of being to local reporting what Julian Clary is to Rugby League.” Hahahahah…..Wicked, wicked….. and with lethal force. MOT


  2. Ropey Wyla

    Hilarious 🙂
    The depth of your incite with regards to the lives of primates rivals that of Attenborough.


  3. AllWhiteNow

    Rob Lomax? laughing too hard….


  4. You don’t much like Millwall do you Rob. I’ve had a few let’s say interesting days out down there myself- The old den. I never took it all too seriously with them to be honest. It’s mostly posturing and although this isn’t the site to indulge in memories of F.V Millwall need to feel like they’ve “done a job” on us poor “norverners” lol They certainly didn’t on at least two of these occasions but it’s vitally important to them to feel like they’ve educated us. I’ve got a couple of “wall” buddies and a lot of them are as passionate about their club as us and great lads. Like I say- in my opinion it’s a cultural mentality thing- now diluted to the extent that it has become a token gesture of defiance. I wouldn’t let it “bovver” you too much mate. NUFC


  5. So there’s 2 boxes at millwall
    Danny baker has one, who has the other are there any other millwall fans that can afford one?


  6. The Scumwall players have been amazingly wetting themselves with excitement, practically everyday in the press, since the opening league fixture against Leeds was announced.
    The Leeds game to them is their biggest Cup Final game that they are ever likely to play in, during their miserable season and that is why they are already getting excited like a bunch of kids.
    Their half empty “toilet of a stadium” holds 20,000, but their Cup Final against Leeds never gets any more than 12,000 and much lower for non-Cup Final games against everybody else.
    The Scumwall executive boxes should be renamed “thug boxes”, because from what I have seen, there doesn’t appear to be many well balanced executives in those individual “Pig Stys”, just low-life thugs, singing about Galatasaray.


  7. Nice one rob keep up the good work over two hours and still no reply from south east London maybe the one that can read has gone to Southend for his hols easy three point for are first game MOT


    • Milwall fans don’t go to Southend, it’s north of the Thames, they’ll get a nosebleed ! Hence why so few ever make it up here to Leeds for their biggest away game of the season!


  8. Hospitality at the Den? Oxymorons abound, I think you’ll probably find they’re actually machine gun nests!


  9. Mirfieldwhite

    Hi rob. Strong rumour that McCormack Is going to Fulham for 10m . From same guy who had 500 on hockday at plenty to one. I’d take that te be fair alas long as we get a few new faces in


  10. The biggest smallest club in the world

    How’s Rob these days? Looking forward to you coming down in person Rob, to mingle with us Neanderthal racists. Sorry it’s taken me so long to post this, but I had to get one of my special uncles to check the speling.


  11. nick watts

    dont take the pi###


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