Yes, itβs only Twitter – but our esteemed and reliable fanzine folk at The Square Ball might just have themselves a little scoop here. Itβs a YES π€ from Rodrigo de Paul, and our top flight status could well be about to get a lot more secure.
Marching On Together
Posted in Football, Leeds United
Tagged Andrea Radrizzani, Argentina, Elland Road, fans, Football, investment, Italia, Leeds United, Marcelo Bielsa, media, money, Premier League, promotion, Serie A, Sky TV, soccer, supporters, transfer window, transfers, Twitter, Udinese, UK Football, WACCOE, Wordpress, Yorkshire
Maradona – will he finally realise his Leeds United dream?
According to certain media sources, Leeds United are planning to tempt 42 year old Francesco Totti out of retirement to fire them to promotion. The speculation follows hard on the heels of suggestions that fellow World Cup winner Gianluigi Buffon could be in line to replace Kiko Casilla in goal, as Leeds seemingly look to experience for next season’s Championship campaign.
Given this apparent non-ageist policy, Life, Leeds United, the Universe & Everything is now asking the $64,000 question: is it finally time to make good on the ambition, dating back to the mid-eighties, of bringing Diego Maradona to Elland Road?
They say that any winning team needs a strong spine and, with Buffon in goal and the attacking partnership of Totti and Maradona, we’d only need a legendary centre-back and maybe a holding midfielder of the same ilk, and we’d be cooking with gas. Franz Beckenbauer owes Leeds United a favour or two after his pivotal role in the 1975 European Cup Final, so maybe he could slot in alongside Liam Cooper, allowing our shrewd transfer team to capitalise on the market value of Pontus Jansson. And Beckenbauer, a sprightly 73, could also act as a defensive mid, although surely our own David Batty could do a job there despite his relative inexperience at only 50 years old.
These are exciting times for Leeds United as they seek to exploit the potential of geriatric footballers the world over. Could Diego Maradona really be the jewel in our promotion crown at the age of 58?
Only time, and possibly TalkSport Radio, will tell.
Posted in Football, Leeds United
Tagged Age Concern, Andrea Radrizzani, Argentina, Beckenbauer, David Batty, Elland Road, fans, Football, Football League, Germany, history, investment, Italy, Leeds United, Maradona, Marcelo Bielsa, media, Premier League, promotion, rumours, silly season, soccer, supporters, TalkSport, The Championship, transfer window, transfers, Twitter, UK Football, Wordpress, Yorkshire
Bielsa – exclusion zone imposed
The Football League is to take a leaf out of the MoD Falklands tactical war book circa 1982 in a bid to find an appropriate sanction for the Leeds United boss Marcelo Bielsa, who has been found guilty of doing what everyone else in the game has been doing for years now.
In a move to be codenamed “Operation Belgrano“, Bielsa will be torpedoed and sunk if he is found to have strayed within 200 miles of United’s training complex at Thorp Arch. The decision has been warmly received among the has-been element of English football punditry, with a Mr S. Collymore taking a break from his latest anger management course to comment “Gotcha!” in an irritating Midlands accent.
The decision also affects the ability of United’s manager to be present at any of their games inside the exclusion zone, including of course the Elland Road stadium. Instead, Bielsa will control team matters remotely via a video link to be set up on an upturned bucket in the Leeds technical area.
The Football League, confirming the measure, commented: “Yes, we know that the training ground Spygate thingy has happened before, but we always, as a matter of policy, make an example of Leeds United, especially when they’re being really annoying and troublesome, as they are currently, what with being four points clear at the top and threatening to go up”.
Leeds United have declined to comment, beyond confirming that their spy has now been sacked after inaccurately describing Derby County in his report as “a football team”. However, a Mr. F. Lampard of Direby was understood to have said “Rejoice! Rejoice!!”
The average IQ of Sky Football pundits is 63.
Posted in Football, Leeds United
Tagged Andrea Radrizzani, Argentina, Derby County, Elland Road, England, Falklands, fans, Football, Football League, General Belgrano, gutter press, hypocrisy, Leeds United, Malvinas, Marcelo Bielsa, media, Premier League, promotion, satire, Shaun Harvey, Sky TV, soccer, supporters, The Championship, Twitter, UK Football, Wordpress, Yorkshire
Welcome to Leeds United, Marcelo Bielsa
The Marcelo Bielsa era at Leeds United has officially begun, with the man they call “el Loco” – the Madman – holding his inaugural press conference at Elland Road on Monday. Despite a reputation for lengthy press sessions, this was a brisk hour and twenty two minutes, with much of it taken up by the translation process. During that time, we all learned a fair bit about the new United boss. There were questions, answers, a few laughs and no grenades.
One thing that stood out was that, despite his evident dislike of false modesty, Bielsa is not short of humility. He batted back questions about Pep Guardiola regarding him as the best coach in the world, by hanging that accolade firmly around the Manchester City boss’s own neck. The overall picture was of a man who would not be settling for sound bites or stereotypes – a man indeed with his own philosophy and the determination to see that imprinted on his new situation.
When it came to brass tacks, the Argentinean revealed that he thought the Leeds United squad was top-heavy by maybe 15 players, whilst acknowledging that it needed strengthening in four or five areas. Although he stated that there wouldn’t be too many players coming in, and that he saw the youth element at the club as being a potentially useful resource, it still seems likely that there will be some significant player turnover in the near future – with outgoing players making up the bulk of that.
Overall, Bielsa’s debut day went well, and seemed to be well-received, certainly on social media. For this, we must thank the affable and efficient translator, who managed to convey not just the text of Marcelo’s utterances, but also nuance, light and shade. There was even some eye contact from Bielsa, a man notoriously not given to that – and, more remarkably still, the odd smile.
The only potential gaffe came when Bielsa was asked whether he preferred Don Revie or Brian Clough, and delivered a brief homily on his football philosophy, stating “In terms of winning the right way, I prefer to lose rather than cheat or play tricks.Β I prefer beautiful football rather than over-pragmatic football. Playing well brings you closer to winning things.Β I don’t think we can claim that playing badly is a way that achieves victory.”
That’s all well and good, but anyone working for the United cause needs to be wary of straying into heresy; sections of the press are all too ready to pounce gleefully on any apparent endorsement of the old myth that Cloughy was all good and the Don all bad. Perhaps a little while spent around LS11 will lead to a reassessment in this particular area. It was a distinctly left-field question, though and, so far, at least, nobody seems to be holding Bielsa’s slightly equivocal response against him.
If anything, this one uncertain moment summed up the abiding sense that here is an appointment that could as easily go extraordinarily wrong as it could sublimely right. In the here and now, nobody can predict which of those two extremes is the more likely – people are just settling for the near certainty that it won’t be anything in between. This union of crazy club with crazy man could indeed be a match made in heaven – or hell.
For the moment, then, it’s full ahead for the good ship Leeds with Captain Bielsa at the helm. May fair winds and calm waters see him safe to the destination we all wish so fervently to reach, there to prosper and maybe find some silver. The mission is clear, the rewards are great. And, while the voyage may be long or short, what we can most definitely predict is that it’s highly unlikely to be boring.
Loco Bielsa – new Leeds coach?
The rumours that Leeds United are set to dispense with the services of coach Paul Heckingbottom simply refuse to go away. Indeed, they get stronger with every passing hour, and crazier too. The latest embellishment to the “Heckingbottom to get the boot at Leeds” whisper is an unlikely-sounding “and will rejoin Barnsley“. I wonder if the Tykes fans would be up for that?
Leeds fans, meanwhile, are lapping up the stories linking United with any number of replacements – even before little details like creating a vacancy have been attended to. That vacancy may well be posted quite soon though; the initial trickle of Hecky Out rumours has turned into a torrent that seems set to sweep away the former Barnsley man and lifelong Leeds hater. Even now he is on holiday, a status he mentioned in the context of being sacked, when he first occupied the Elland Road hot seat. His position now is being said by many Leeds fans, having seen this riptide of rumour swell to tsunami proportions, to be well nigh untenable.
So, if Hecky is to be gone, where does that leave Leeds United? Surely, after all the comings and goings under Cellino, and with Radrizzani already on the verge of wielding the axe a second time, only a complete nutter would consider the Leeds job. Well, the Whites may just, if the latest story is to be believed, have found that nutter in the volatile shape of the madcap Argentine, Marcelo Bielsa.
Who? Actually, if you’ve had anything to do with the LUFC hashtag these past few hours, you won’t need to ask who. For those who have not seen the Twitterstorm, though, all you need to know about Bielsa is here, together with a few bright-spark edits from the usual suspects. Suffice to say that he’s a brilliant coach who has his teams play a highly watchable brand of attacking football – and also that he is, reputedly, as mad as a box of frogs. If that’s not the identikit Leeds manager after the own heart of every United fan out there, then I don’t know who is.
Bielsa is nearly 63, so even though he might be a little cuckoo, he’s no spring chicken. But any managerial appointment is a risk for a club like Leeds and, having considered at some time or other most of the rational possibilities, maybe it’s time to try the other sort. From that point of view, the man they call Loco Bielsa would seem to be the obvious choice.
If this story does turn out to be true, then it’s safe to say that it’ll be a very interesting “however long it lasts” down at Elland Road. Twitter seems excited, and I must confess I am too. So if Hecky’s race really is run – and, let’s face it, his credibility as Leeds boss has been shot full of holes with all this talk and yet not a word from the club – then we’ll need a new man in sharpish.
And who better, in that case, than a controversial, maverick, hothead madman such as Bielsa? For an insane club like Leeds, he ticks more of the right boxes than just about anyone else you could imagine. It would be a “major coup” for the Whites, but much would of course depend on Heckingbottom’s fate, firstly – and then on whether or not the Argentine would want to work in the United management structure as it stands. But it’d be a refreshing change, a man of real stature and a genuine, one-off individual into the bargain. Since demotion from the Premier League 14 years ago, Leeds have tried just about everything to recapture the good times. It might just be that it’ll take a real nutter in the Bielsa mould to get this club back on track.
Becchio: will the prodigal return?
Sadly, it all went sour when Becchio, lured by the prospect of more money and higher grade football, trod a well-worn path from Leeds to Norwich City. Rob Snodgrass and Jonny Howson made the same move, and it worked out for them. But for Becchio, the shift to Carrow Road was an unmitigated disaster. He couldn’t score when he played and, soon enough, he wasn’t getting any game time. Spells at Rotherham followed his Norwich nightmare, together with a period back home in Argentina. Nowhere did he look remotely as comfortable and happy as he had done at Leeds United. That vital spark was missing, and Becchio’s career has waned, on the point of fizzling out.
Now, we have a situation whereby Leeds, having failed abysmally to sign an additional striker within the transfer window, are rather light up front. It’s an odd situation for the club to find itself in; having let a reasonable performer in Antenucci leave in summer, they have been negligent in omitting to replace him.
Becchio, for his part, is a free agent after his recent career calamities. So he now forms part of a small pool of potential recruits still available to interested employers after the window has slammed shut.
Could Becchio recapture his mojo with a return to Leeds? Would it be an option that United might feel obliged to consider, having been so careless as to end up short of attacking options? Stranger things have happened. This blog subscribes to the view that good players remain good players and some just need the right environment to bring the best out of them. We’ve seen that over and over again down the years; it could be that, in Becchio, we have a square peg just waiting to be inserted into a square hole down Elland Road way.
At the very least, it would excite some interest and maybe a bit of optimism around LS11. Becchio would be the prodigal returned – maybe we should just kill the fatted calf and get on with it.
Posted in Football, Leeds United
Tagged Argentina, Leeds United, norwich city, Rotherham United, The Championship, transfers, Yorkshire
Well, another transfer window is flapping wide open in LS11 just as it is in less crisis-torn football outposts and, embargo notwithstanding, a couple of Serie A fringe performers have breezed into Elland Road and signed for Leeds. Possibly there are more to come, maybe an outgoing or two as well. It’s certainly different, in a good way too, from some of the depressingly inert United transfer markets of the unlamented Bates era – but it hardly compares with the wheeling and dealing we did in more halcyon days. And, if anything, some of the rumours that never came to fruition down the years were more exciting and entertaining than certain signings that actually did happen (take a bow, Messrs. Sharpe & Brolin).
There have been so many players linked with transfers to Leeds United over our chequered history and, in the nature of these things, only a small proportion ever actually pulled on the famous white shirt.Β Of those who never arrived, it would probably be easy to name at least two world-class International sides comprising players who were rumoured to be signing for United, but missed out on that pinnacle of honours and finished their careers tragically unfulfilled – apart from the odd cartload ofΒ silverware.Β The likes of TomΓ‘Ε‘ SkuhravΓ½, Rainer Bonhof, Peter Shilton, TrevorΒ Francis and even Dean Saunders have all, at one time or another, been tipped asΒ Leeds United players, only to remain trapped in dreadful anonymity at the likesΒ of Liverpool, Bayern Munich or Nottingham Forest.Β Here – in time-honoured reverse order – are my top three exciting but unrealised rumours – you may well have candidates of your own, so please feel free to comment.
3. Duncan Ferguson
In 1994, it really did look as though this one might happen.Β The wonderfully talented if ever so slightly thuggish Scottish 
striker, looking to move south to England from then mighty Rangers FC, seemed nailed-on for a transfer to Leeds in the region of Β£4million, but ended up at Everton where he prospered before moving on to Newcastle.Β Ferguson had a bit of a “reputation” on and off the field as aΒ nutter – in fact he did time in Barlinnie for over-generous use of that nut in aΒ dispute with Raith Rovers defender John McStay.Β A little prone toΒ over-exuberance when he’d had a drop or two (he was known as Drunken Ferguson orΒ alternatively Duncan Disorderly) he had previous convictions for nutting aΒ policeman and punching and kicking a supporter on crutches. Nice.
2. Peter Beardsley
This was one of those “definitely happening, mark my words and get your moneyΒ on it” rumours 
that you’d have so loved to be true.Β Beardsley was a wonderfulΒ player, class, poise and jinking speed all rolled into one dynamite package of energy and skill. I’d first noticed him in rather abbreviated TVΒ highlights of a Cup game he played for CarlisleΒ United, when he stood out as the real deal among a load of dross.Β After a spellΒ in Vancouver, he moved briefly to Man U – but the other thing about BeardsleyΒ was that he was such a nice, modest guy – not really the type of player for theΒ Theatre of Hollow Myths at all.Β Leeds could have signed him whilst he was atΒ Vancouver – Peter Lorimer recommended that they do just that – but we couldn’tΒ raise the cash (some things never change).Β Beardsley made his name at Newcastle, in the same side as a veteran Kevin Keegan and emerging Chris Waddle.Β From there, a big money move to Liverpool, and it was whilst unaccountably out of favour atΒ Anfield that the Leeds rumour surfaced again – he was buying a house locally,Β he’d been seen at Elland Road – there really did seem to be something in it.Β Sadly, Beardsley was The One Who Got Away – Twice.Β A great shame, as any clubΒ would have been improved by the addition of Beardsley, a phenomenal talent youΒ could have built a team around.
1. Diego Maradona
Surely the craziest rumour ever, bar none.Β In 1987, Leeds had just missed out, under Billy 
Bremner, on an FA Cup Final and promotion to the top flight inΒ the first-ever play-offs.Β We were doomed to a hangover season in 87-88 and theΒ fans’ mood and expectations were dulled. Then sensational whispers emerged that managingΒ director Bill Fotherby, a larger-than-life used-car-salesman of a bloke, hadΒ managed to persuade the agent of Diego Armando Maradona to enter into talks withΒ Leeds United over the proposed signing of the Argentine superstar.Β This wasΒ only just a year after Maradona had just about single-handedly (geddit?) won theΒ World Cup for the Argies, and his stock could hardly have been higher on theΒ global football scene.Β Strangely, he had very nearly signed for SheffieldΒ United as a youngster, and for a measly Β£250,000 at that.Β The Blunts gotΒ Alejandro Sabella instead, who actually did end up briefly at Elland Road.Β ButΒ Maradona was different – astoundingly different to just about anyone else – people comparedΒ him favourably to Pele.Β He was even compared – unfavourably, and by the ever modest and unassuming George Best himself – to self-proclaimed greatest player ever, G. Best. It was a signing that was never going to happen, and surely the Number OneΒ Daft Rumour of all time.
-o0o-
It’s tempting to wonder how the history of Leeds United might have differedΒ if we’d signed Trevor Francis and Peter Shilton in 1974, or Peter Beardsley inΒ 1990, or even the “Hand of God” himself in 1987.Β The story of any major club isΒ littered with “what ifs” and this certainly applies to our beloved Leeds.Β OfΒ course our sights are set lower these days – although we’re now roughly aboutΒ where we were in ’87 when an enterprising director started that Diego rumour,Β with a view to putting us back on the map.
Perhaps somebody in the Elland Road corridors of power will try to get the excitement going this time around with an audacious loan-with-a-view-to-permanent swoop for the undeniably promising prospect Lionel Messi?Β Watch thisΒ space…
Posted in Football, Leeds United
Tagged Argentina, Beardsley, Duncan Ferguson, Everton FC, Leeds United, Liverpool FC, Maradona, Newcastle United, Rangers FC, transfers, UK Football
Alejandro Sabella – formerly of Elland Road parish
So we are to be spared a rerun of the 1974 World Cup Final, when a technically superior Holland contrived somehow to lose to those pesky, arrogant Deutschers. Instead, it will be a best of three decider as Argentina and Germany, tied after the tournaments of 1986 and 1990 at one head-to-head World Cup apiece, do battle in Brazil for the title of ultimate Champions 2014 style.
In truth, all that will be decided is who is the best of an indifferent bunch at this over-hyped, over-rated tournament. Germany booked their Final place on Tuesday, beating a Brazil side of whom their angry fans could with justification sing “It’s just like watching Barnsley”. The Germans had nowt to beat, as we say in God’s Own Country, but they will find Argentina a much tougher proposition. To Messi and his men falls the responsibility of preserving South American infallibility where tournaments held in the Americas are concerned. No European side has ever won the World Cup over there – can a good but by no means brilliant Germany really be the first?
The second semi-final saw Holland keep up their own 100% record of World Cup failure. Having confirmed his position of World’s Best Coach, in the eyes of the Man U-obsessed British press at least, by a quirky goal-keeping substitution against Costa Rica, Pride of Devon manager-elect van Gaal then brilliantly decided to stick with his number one No. 1 Cillessen for this shoot-out. Predictably, his confidence affected by that bizarre substitution, the poor lad didn’t get near most of the Argentinean penalties, as erstwhile super-sub Krul sat despondent and abandoned on the bench. So Holland are out, their Manchester-bound coach out-foxed by honorary Yorkshireman Alejandro Sabella, once of the Sheffield Blades and, more pertinently, the Whites of Leeds United.
Who, then, will emerge victorious now? Germany will be on a high after their candy-from-a-baby beating of the Worst Brazil Side Ever. But they’re not anywhere near as good as the hosts made them look – and, if Messi can put in just one truly Messi-esque performance, Europe will be left waiting for its first Americas Cup. That’s the prediction of Life, Leeds United, the Universe & Everything. Argentina to win, without the need for extra time or a penalty lottery – Germany to be left reflecting that you get nowt for being second, as the Greatest Club Captain of all once said. It’s going to be World Cup glory for ex-Leeds Man Sabella – and with an enviable pedigree like that, will it really be a surprise?
Posted in Football, Leeds United
Tagged America, Argentina, Brasil, Champions, Deutschland, FuΓball, Germany, Holland, Leeds United, Manchester United, Sheffield United, World Cup 2014
Mr. Angry “Cholo” Simeone
AtlΓ©tico Madrid 1, Real Madrid 4 (aet) – Champions League Final 2014
David Beckham must have permitted himself the slightest of malicious smiles in the wake of his former club Real Madrid’s Champions League triumph over city rivals AtlΓ©tico, who were coached by Beckham’s World Cup ’98 nemesis Diego Simeone. Those of a certain age will readily remember how the wily Argentinian fouled Beckham, who petulantly kicked out at his antagonist instead of getting up and getting on with it.
Beckham was foolish, but Simeone had exploited the situation to his best advantage, admitting later that he feigned injury from the kick in order to get the England player sent off. Β That’s exactly what happened, and the gallant ten men of England ended up going out on penalties in a familiar hard luck story. The unfortunate if misguided Beckham was vilified at home for his immature reaction to Simeone’s deliberate provocation, something he took years to live down. Β Surely he must have harboured some resentment ever since?
If he has, then that resentment might just have had the edge taken off it at the end of the Champions League Final in Lisbon at the weekend. Β Leading 1-0 deep into stoppage time, Simeone’sΒ AtlΓ©tico team were cruelly pegged back by an equaliser in the 93rd minute. Β In extra time, Real’s class told as they ran out 4-1 winners – all of which proved a touch too much for the temperamental Simeone, who completely lost it on the touchline and appeared to be trying to get at the referee or others on the pitch who had offended his sensibilities.
For Beckham, it must have felt like the ultimate pay-off. Β He’d had quite a bit of his own back for the disaster of ’98 by scoring a penalty against Argentina to defeat them 1-0 in the group stages of the 2002 World Cup, which would prove to be Simeone’s last appearance on that exalted stage. But to see one of his former clubs in Real inflict such a hammer-blow on his old enemy must have been a moment of great satisfaction – human nature being what it is.
Simeone, who has had great success this season as his team won la Liga, consigning Real to the ignominy of third spot, felt this reverse as a bitter blow to which he clearly reacted bitterly. Β It’s almost certain that he will face UEFA sanctions for his unseemly display as AtlΓ©tico’s defeat was confirmed – and the way in which the baser end of his nature was revealed will long be remembered by those who were queuing up to praise him in advance of the Lisbon final.
It had even been suggested in that run-up to the game that a film should be made of the rise of the Madrid underdogs, with Burt Lancaster playing the part of coach “Cholo” Simeone. Β Quite apart from the fact that Lancaster would find this a difficult role to play, on account of having been dead these past 20 years, it may now be felt that he wasn’t in any case an appropriate actor to portray Cholo’s complex mixture of passion, slyness and thuggery.
United old boys Vinnie & Eric
As to who possibly could play this demanding role – a cross between former Leeds United stars turned film actors Vinnie Jones and Eric Cantona might just be ideal, if impossible to find outside of this blog’s imagination. Β It’s just a thought, after all – but apart from the errant Argie portraying himself, I just can’t think of a better candidate.
Posted in Football, Leeds United
Tagged actors, Argentina, AtlΓ©tico Madrid, Champions League, David Beckham, Eric Cantona, France 98, movie stars, Real Madrid, Vinnie Jones, World Cup
Wishing you a Happy Return
As any fule kno, the title means Happy Birthday to you, Luciano – please come back to Leeds United. The birthday wishes are standard; Becchio is 30 today which is a watershed in anyone’s life – and all the more so for a professional footballer, for whom the thirties are old-man, retirement territory.
Naturally, any article which even hints at the possible return of our former hero and regular goalscorer will be pounced upon by those who love to be seen pouring scorn on any such common sense. Β Loads of goals, total commitment, rapport with the crowd and unstinting bravery amid the flying boots of a crowded opposition penalty area – these are things that some people simply hate and can’t abide the thought of. Β The hostility which ensues whenever anybody suggests that Becchio could still be a Leeds United asset has to be seen to be believed. Β There are some angry and immature people out there, and I expect I shall receive some abusive feedback from a few of them. Β Who knows, I may even allow the odd one through?
The fact is of course that a Luciano type player is exactly what we need to increase the options for how our team might be set up and deployed. Β If El Hombre himself were to arrive as a returning prodigal son, with a quality winger in tow – perhaps the French Ligue 1 might be a good place to look – then so much the better. Β It seems obvious to me that we would carry much more of a threat over the course of a game with such a significant augmentation of the options, both in the starting line-up and on the bench. Β At our level, with the aspirations we have, you can’t have too many decent Championship players. Β Becchio may not have made the grade, quite, at top level – though he’s hardly been given a chance – but in the second tier, he’s proven quality. Β What’s more, he would be absolutely champing at the bit. Β Post 30 years old, he will hear the clock ticking – and he will wish to make his mark while he can. Β Familiar surroundings at Elland Road would most likely bring out the best of Becchio.
Happy 30th birthday, Luci’. Β Here’s hoping we see you back to your best in the famous white shirt again soon. Β Now bring on those scornful dismissive comments, do your worst. Β But please – let me hear from those of you who know what you’re talking about too…
Posted in Football, Leeds United
Tagged Argentina, Espana, goalscorer, Happy Birthday, Leeds United, Luciano Becchio, norwich city, prodigal son, promotion, transfer window
Don Revie, the Greatest Manager Ever
Billy Bremner, the Greatest Skipper Ever
Gordon Strachan, Second Only to King Billy
Howard Wilkinson, Second in Line to The Don
Life, Leeds United, the Universe & Everything 